TV rots your brain, Dungeons & Dragons makes you a cultist, and video games make you slow and stupid. I'm glad we're finally past all that, at least almost. Each of these stigmas were born in a lack of information and the stubborn unwillingness to take in any information on those subjects. Parents today know it isn't about forbidding electronic entertainment as the source of all evil, it's about having information about what their kids are into. I grew up playing video games, and my brain certainly wasn't rotted (that depends on whether you're asking my mother). Don't forget that a few hundred years ago reading books was considered a bad influence on children. Our forefathers learned to know better, and so should we.
I don't mind my toddler watching television, but I pay attention to what he watches. He doesn't gain anything from Spongebob, so I switch to Dora the Explorer instead. There are no real lessons in the Power Rangers, so he watches Blue's Clues, Ni Hao Ka-Lan. Wonderpets, Umizoomi, the Backyardigans, those are all beneficial programs that teach thinking and recognition as well as problem-solving, sharing and interacting. I wouldn't let my 10 year old watch Cougartown or Next on Mtv. I know enough about TV shows to know what is a benefit to my kids and what isn't.
Why shouldn't it be that way with games? A lot of parents miss this opportunity to influence the development of their kids. When we were little our parents knew Jack about games, because the most advanced thing out at the time was Beyond Dark Castle (man I miss that game). Today it's different, a good number of parents gamed growing up and know a little something more than the previous generation. I remember an article I read in the paper when Super Mario Bros 2 for the NES was released. It warned parents that the game was violent and a bad influence on children. Something to do with teaching them to jump on each other's heads, or such nonsense. Today's parents are a little more educated. So let's make use of this potential parenting tool.
A few years ago one of my teen sons was a quiet introvert who didn't go out much and didn't communicate well with other kids. I signed him up for an online typing course, just to learn the basics to help him chat more efficiently, and set him up with an online-game account. Playing an MMO, where interaction with peers is required to advance and other players are more likely to approach and engage you in conversation than real life, has really opened him up. As I had hoped, his communication skills developed, he became more outgoing, and he makes friends more easily than before. The trick was moderation. Without a doubt, if your kid is playing an MMO you have to make sure he doesn't go overboard with it, but there are things your child can gain from the experience.
Know your games so you know when to apply them, and you've got an awesome learning tool. What kid is going to say "Aww Dad! I don't wanna play a video game!" ? Mine sure don't. Let's say your kid could use some help with hand-eye coordination. Buy her a real-time strategy game like Battle Realms or Starcraft, which are also very good for multi-tasking skills. Hand-eye-coordination? Pretty much anything for the Wii will cover that. Parappa the Rapper is gold for this purpose too, as well as reflex and reaction time.
Teenagers are tough to handle, I know this. They are learning to think critically and question things, the world isn't just black and white anymore, there are millions of shades of grey. The socio-emotional system in their brain is developing faster than their cognitive control system, causing them to be more susceptible to taking risks, not because they aren't aware of the risks, but because the emotion has more control than the reason. Before they go out in the world, it is our job as parents to teach them that all action has consequence, and punishment doesn't work on them like it did a few years ago. Here's my tip: get them playing story-driven adventure games with a multi-linear narrative; the longer the story the better, because it teaches them action and consequence in both a short and long-term sense. My favorites for this category, and your kids will thank you, are the Gothic and Mass Effect series(16+ for this one). But don't take my word for it, play them and determine for yourselves.
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